Amazing Grace

I was so, so worried. Why? Because that's what I do...I worry. Even if someone tells me that there is only a 5% chance that something bad will occur...I hang on to that 5% and WORRY. It's a horrible, terrible, awful part of my personality. I hate it. But as much as I try, fear and worry creep up on me and often just grab hold! I need to fight harder against this. Anxiety is NOT from God. He wants us to trust and have faith, and worrying is the opposite of that.

But God is so good. Look what He has done for us, and continues to do each day.

Even though I was SO worried about my karyotype test (oh yes, notice how I down-played that? Don't be fooled, I was PETRIFIED), He has delivered me from my fears. Last night at 10 PM I received a NORMAL KARYOTYPE test. That means that both my husband and I are normal chromosomally, and most other conditions can be treated. PRAISE GOD. I am overwhelmed with gratitude and excitement at the possibility of a child...a child that I now know is not only possible, but likely.

Thank you, Lord. I don't deserve Your goodness. But thank you for showering me with Your love anyway.

"Put away all care and thought, strip yourself of all anxiety about yourself...and God will clothe you in Himself and give you things you cannot even conceive. Wholly forget about yourself, as much as you can, and let only the love of God live in your soul." --Fr. Lorenzo Scupoli (Magnificat, August 21, 2013)

Magnificat always finds me when I am at my weakest, and speaks to me in a way no earthly person can. I'm so grateful for the resources and tools available to us in our faith in this modern day. And even more thankful for a God that, like a patient Father, forgives His children when they doubt Him, and rewards them tenfold.

I am overwhelmed. Overjoyed. It's not a bad place to be.

Love, and prayers that you too feel this feeling today...

xoxo,

E