Ladies and Gentlemen...

...we have a heartbeat.

This girl could not be happier!!!!!! 146 BPM and measuring right on track at 6w2d!!!!!!!!! What an amazing miracle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

Though God has certainly blessed me with the peace I have been begging Him for over the last few weeks, I was SO worried this morning. Sobbing through fear, and then joy, and then more fear, and then more joy. I know I need to relax and enjoy each and every moment, and, truly, I am, I just need to get through one more ultrasound (okay, I say that now, but it sounds reasonable in this moment). To see my baby's heartbeat twice is not something I have ever been able to experience. I long and pray for it, but I know God is in control. Until then, I am fighting off fear with both hands. I will not let my joy be stolen!!!!!!!!!!

My next ultrasound is scheduled for June 13. Your continued prayers mean more to me than you will ever know.

My amazing RE asked me to start the Novena of the Holy Spirit today. It is the oldest of all novenas, and he told me that it was the "only novena officially 'prescribed' by the Catholic Church"...I had no idea. And...how strange, it begins today (an amazing day!!!) and ends on my 26th birthday (Pentecost). So, for the next nine days in prayer, that's where I'll be. I feel truly blessed to have a doctor who is so faithful.

And I am sorry, I know these posts are difficult for many of you to read. I am so sorry and please feel free to ignore me. The searing pain of pregnancy announcements is still so fresh in my mind that I can hardly separate my two lives. In fact, I am still hesitant to let a pregnant friend know that I too am expecting, because...well, fear I suppose. It is a pain that is so raw, it feels like just yesterday (and practically was). Know that I am so grateful for your support, and I wish I could give this miracle to each and every one of you right this very second. I know that's not the right thing to say--nothing is, I suppose. I am sorry for my 'lack of the right words.' You are ALWAYS at the very top of my prayer list. Thank you for your prayers for us as well.

Have a wonderful weekend, and GOD BLESS you all.